Changing of the Season

by | Jul 5, 2019 | Blog Posts | 0 comments

In May 2018, I decided it was time. Time to stand on my own two feet for once and not allow myself to fall in with someone else so that I didn’t have to feel alone. Here we are, 14 months later.

I had my terrible marriage, and jumped into another 2.5 year “relationship” from there. That “relationship” was ended in May 2018.

The realization came very quickly that I have actually been standing on my own two feet for quite a while, but for some reason, I didn’t want to accept that.

The first few months, I was just kind of going through the motions, making small moves to try and better myself. I started working out regularly, quit smoking, ran my first Tough Mudder (bucket list item there), and scheduled my first appointment with a Psychiatrist.

November is when things really started to pick up.

My first appointment with the Psychiatrist was relatively painless. Except for the fact that I started crying within the first 5 second and seemed to not be able to gather myself the whole time.

He asked me the general questions about my family history, my history, how I’ve been feeling, etc. I told him about my history with medication for anxiety/depression and how nothing works, I just get nasty side effects. He was really my last hope at finding something that worked.

He prescribed me a medication that he thought would work, or hoped would. Stating, “with your history, this is the only medication i’m comfortable trying”. Told me that he wanted to see me back in a month and asked if I had been seeing a counselor. I advised him that I hadn’t. He advised I definitely needed to start meeting with a counselor before returning for my follow up. That was a moment of relief, and a moment of pain. It was validation that I was doing the right thing, but also validation that I really was struggling as much as I thought I was.

More to come.

0 Comments

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Coronavirus and Mental Health

Coronavirus has changed the way we go about our daily lives.  Increased isolation, changes in routine, social distancing, and fear have all had a worldwide impact, especially related to mental...

On Borderline Personality Disorder and Life

Mental illnesses are considered invisible illnesses because they don't have a "look", and Borderline Personality Disorder falls into this category. You can't look at someone and know if they are...

15 Bible Verses for Mental Health

I wanted to do a post on some Bible verses that have meaning to me because I haven't shared a whole lot lately about my Faith, but it is important to me. I am still growing and learning, as are most...

Reflecting on “That Day”

No one wants to go to the hospital. Let alone go for anything related to mental illness. I was the same. Thankfully, I have people who were able to make sure I was taken care of. However, I made...

Shame and Embarrassment in Counseling

I've been in counseling for a while and started seeing a new counselor in May. It has been an eye-opening experience. The sessions have pushed me harder and further than I have been in the past. In...

“That Day” Episode 3

This is the final episode of the "That Day" trilogy and how my mental illness tried to take me out. Episodes One and Two are up for your viewing. Thursday Morning They let us know that breakfast had...

“That Day” Episode 2

You can read part 1 here. When we arrived and told them what was going on, I was taken back right away and put in a room with my parents. Still crying, but had resolved myself to the fact that this...

“That Day” Episode 1

***Potential Trigger Warning*** I previously shared the experience I had with being more open about my mental illness at work. You can read more about that here. In February 2020, I was extremely...

Mental Illness and the Workplace

I spent a good portion of my life struggling on my own; knowing something was “different” about me but I never had the support to help me get answers. Walking around aimlessly, I lived off of...

5 Things That Help My Anxiety

Not everyone will find the same coping skills effective with their anxiety when it comes in with a vengeance, but here are some tools and tricks that I use to help me get through those times. I have...

Subscribe

Categories

Subscribe

Join our mailing list to receive the latest blog posts and updates from The Art of Mental Illness.

You have Successfully Subscribed!

%d bloggers like this: